A Farewell. A Loss. A Change.

13 July 2010

16:47

After a several hour flight delay, I arrived back at the Convent at 2:00 A.M. I had called Sister Florin while still at the Mumbai Airport to notify her of the approximate late hour that I would be reaching Bangalore, and she agreed to open the gate for me. I was much obliged.

The meeting in Mumbai was a flop. I was looking forward to meeting with Sheela, the Director of SPARC, but she did not show up to the office. Spencer flew back to the U.S. on a red-eye flight before the meeting took place to partake in family-related affairs. . . So it goes.

I did meet again with Avery, and we had a long discussion about all of the ins and outs of SPARC, Mahila Millan and the Federation. Being able to speak freely in English was a treat! I now have an infinitely better grasp of how SPARC and the field offices function,. If an alliance can be formed with University of the Pacific, SPARC is an organization that can expose and educate beyond any verbose description.

Being back in Bangalore is a relief. After a few days of trying to explore Mumbai in the heat and rain, I was completely fatigued, emotionally and physically. I’ve become so accustomed to Bangalore that traveling, eating, to work, shopping, etc is easy and effortless. I am gaining a firm grasp on how to function and live in this city and can predict the scope of events that may or may not occur throughout my day. I do not possess this ease in Mumbai, and perhaps because I had already been there once, I was a little over confident and less mentally prepared than I could have been for the struggles I faced.

**Note: The train station during rush hour at Dadar Station is always that crazy, and I was officially warned to never try to catch that particular train again, even if it means waiting an hour or two. The advice is well taken. **

I came back to the Bangalore Office on Prageeja’s last day. I’m just realizing that I haven’t written much about her, but she was the other intern that was working in this office. She is doing her masters in Planning at the Center for Environmental Planning and Technology in Ahmeeabad, India. Being educated, her spoken English is great. She is the one with whom I ate meals and conversed regularly. In exchange for my editing her final report and other various compositions, she translated all the chit-chat and discussions in the office for me. On Saturday, she completed her training with SPARC and will be returning to classes next week. We held a nice farewell party for her, which included taking photos, wishing her all the best and presenting small gifts. A lot of nice words and feelings were expressed. I miss her company and friendship.

On Saturday, I also learned of a misfortunate occurrence. Rajeshwari’s (another girl whose companionship I began to thoroughly enjoy) father passed away on Monday, July 5^th, 2010. I was told that it was due to alcohol. It was heartbreaking news. In India, it is custom that the relatives of the deceased stay in the house and grieve for 41 days. There are no words to describe such a sad occasion. The loss of a friendship and the loss of a life cut deeper than I’ll express.

Until today, John had been absent since I returned. During this time (without Prageeja), my ability to communicate was limited to gestures, broken English and Tamil, and routine. It takes risk combined with trial and error to create and maintain a connection with everyone in the office, but we are all making an effort. The girls and I are learning how to converse through photos, laughter and speech. The men know a little more English, but they are reserved to only say key words when necessary.

When John came today, we had a meeting about future business and how some of our projects had progressed while I was away in Mumbai. As I was getting up to leave, he hesitated and mechanically gave me a thumbs-up as reassurance and encouragement. It was strange to see such a confident and assured man show uncertainty in a signal so ordinary in America, but it was not a gesture common to him. I was touched by his thoughtfulness. He knows as well as I do that the second half of my stay in India and my interaction with SPARC is going to be drastically different than my first several weeks. Oral language is a powerful tool to have in common. Without it, there are unforeseen obstacles looming, but I am not worried. The ladies and men here are unfathomably accepting and open to adjustment and collaboration.